Nine-Decker Burger (aka The Millennium Dome Burger)

OK, we've all made an eight-level burger before, right?  They're soooo last week, darling.  Sam and Dad decided to push the envelope just a little more, and Sam said "Let's do nine".....so we did.  The burger shown above is NOT the nine-decker burger, obviously, it's Dad's double cheese bacon beefburger, made at the same time....looks good eh?

Constructing a nine-decker is not a simple thing to do.  You need a big pan to cook the burgers, and you need to plan everything before you start work.  If you're using bacon, for example, have it cooked to your requirements beforehand.  Sauces and pickles should be on hand.

Skewers are essential when your burger will be taller than it is wide.

Add ketchup between levels as you build, and any other bits and pieces you fancy (gherkins can be seen atop Dad's burger, in the background)....

Finally add your fries and chicken nuggets and you have something waaaay better than a MacDaniels or a Burger Prince, for a quarter the price and ten times the fun.  And the skewers sticking out of the bun look like the Millennium Dome!  It's a win, win, win situation!

Spatchcock Garlic Chicken - Part One

Spatchcock chicken.  Something you read about in the food supplements of the broadsheets?  Or watch on the TV?  Well it needn't be.  It's oh so simple, and can save you money.  Last weekend Sam and Dad spatchcocked a chicken, and it was simply delicious.  Sam enjoyed cutting the spine out.  To put it simply, all you need to do is remove the backbone of your chicken and flatten it out.  Use a couple of skewers to keep the chicken spread out.  The one above is Dad's Sunday dinner (for tomorrow).

For a change I'm marinating the chicken overnight, so it should be super tasty on Sunday.  It's a simple marinade of olive oil, lemon juice, paprika and crushed garlic.  Ingredients shown above.

When you mix these four parts together they create an irresistibly yummy liquid, which smells absolutely bloody lovely!  No, honestly, try it, it is fabulous.  And looks a bit "cheffy" too.

And when you pour it over the chicken it looks like this.  It's now sitting in the fridge for the night, and each time I open the door, OH MY GOODNESS!  The aroma is overwhelming and mouth-watering.  Roll on Sunday dinner!


Don't be scared to spatchcock.  It's fun AND has extra benefits which I'll mention tomorrow.

Home-made Krushem

So, we've been trying to master the dark art of making fried chicken at home that is as good as you buy from KFC....and we're 95% of the way to cracking the secret code.  In the meantime we tried our hand at recreating their in-house ice cream treat, the Krushem!  Malteser flavour to be precise.

First, assemble your ingredients....

For the Maltesers version you need to blitz or crush 40g worth....

Add the Maltesers to ice cream, milk to add fluidity, and jazz up the styling with food colouring if you wish....

Blend them together....

Pour into a glass, or preferably an old Krushem cup....

And away you go!  You can make nearly three home-made treats for the price of one from KFC.

Here are the figures for last weekend's creations:

Ice cream (184g used) : £0.18
Milk (88g) : £0:05
Maltesers (40g) : £0.33
Food colouring (estimating on the high side) : £0.10
Electricity (again guessing high) : £0.10

Total : £0.76

Have a go!  We're trying a different flavour soon....

Quattro Burgers

Who needs MacDonalds (other mass produced burger chains are available)?  Sam and Dad decided to create the Quattro Burger (left, Dad's, you can tell because of the cheese) and the Quinto Burger (Sam's, on the right, just red sauce).  These beauties are not healthy, so don't eat one every day!

Have you ever heard of a Big Mac?  Meaty, you may think.  Well think again....a Big Mac contains just 91g of beef.  Less than a quarter of a pound, if you prefer medieval measures.

An extra pair of hands is a seriously good idea, you need them when the leaning towers of beef begin to take shape and reach for the ceiling.

We recommend pausing halfway through building your burgers, to record the moment for posterity.

Ingredients:  Beef mince, bread buns, ketchup, American cheese, mustard, according to taste.  It's all you need, and all you can eat!

Sam & Dad's Most Excellent Foot-Long Subs

We dedicate our latest adventure to the one and only Adam Richman, aka Man Vs Food.

During last summer's adventure in Scotland we decided to enjoy a Subway foot-long sub as our lunch every day.  Filling, tasty, but.....no sweetcorn to be found north of the border!  Sam's sub of choice starts with ham and sweetcorn, yet there was no sweetcorn to be found in Scotland!  Odd.  We've written to Subway, but so far there's no reply.  We decided to construct our Dream Sub, and assembled the pile of ingredients shown above.  Can you spot all the things we used?

We split the breadstick (tiger bread, Sam asked for it),  and found that one half was indeed a foot long - the other piece was a foot and a quarter....

Both were buttered.

Then we started to warm up those ingredients that required heating....four pans were required....

To add healthiness, lettuce was deployed.

And tomato.

On Sam's sub there was a huge dressing of sweetcorn.

Ample cucumber followed....

And then, natch, ham....in both....

Next into Sam's was sausage-shaped home-made burger, rolled and shaped by the man himself.

Into Dad's went a home-made cheeseburger using American cheese, sliced in half.

Followed by a fried egg (in memory of Sam's Grandad - egg banjo was his favourite food) .

Then we added hot dog sausages into both.

Sam added Jaffa Cakes, meatballs, and tomato soup!  With a side of Milky Way and Fudge bars.  Crazy!

While Dad added onion gravy and meatballs.

To finish we added a handful of fries on top....

 We dived into our sandwiches at half past noon on Saturday lunchtime....an hour later we conceded defeat.  Sam had eaten all the filling of both halves of his creation, and scooped out most of the bread from the half-subs.  Dad had eaten a complete half, and most of the second half.


But in the battle of Sam & Dad versus Food today........food won.

Jucy Lucy - Thank You Adam Richman!

Jucy Lucy.  The spelling is courtesy of Man vs Food on a visit to Minneapolis.  A Jucy Lucy is a cheeseburger with the cheese on the inside of the burger - delicious!  For a little background look here .

 The Jucy Lucy (no I) is the claim of Matt's Bar. whereas the grammatically correct Juicy Lucy is found at the 5-8 Club.  One day we will visit both.  Oh yes.  Each claims to be the inventor, but it will never be proved - Adam Richman of Man vs Food gave his solemn verdict but was unfortunately drowned out by a passing truckful of sound effects techs.

You first need to get hold of some "80-20 chuck".  This translates into English as minced beef with the fat percentage at least 20%.  Season to your taste.

Then split into quarter pound dollops, which will form the burgers.

Use clingfilm, and make two patties.  On top of each other, in case the picture doesn't describe it....

To make it "fairly" even, use a very heavy pan to flatten the burgers.  Sam LOVED doing this!

Your burgers won't look as round as MacD's.  Don't worry, yours will be pure meat, theirs are full of all manner of other stuff.  Yours WILL taste at least a million times better.

Take some American cheese.  Quarter a slice and place on the patty.  American cheese?  It is ANY sliced cheese you can find.  No, really!  The yellower and plasticer the better.

Put your second burger on top.  Crimp the edges VERY tightly.

And whack it in the pan!

Fry, and keep watch on it.  The first burger needs to be heated for eight minutes.

Then flip.  Cook for another six minutes.

You will be rewarded with this FANTASTIC looking burger phenomena.

Waste no time, and stick it in a bun.

Inside-out cheeseburger heaven....an absolute winner.  Thank you Adam Richman.